borders
physicality/loss of true personality/defined by an empty touch/distanced by a one night demoralizing fuck/thought you could love so much/memorizing silhouetting outlines/of the face/that put you in your place.back to the wall/head bent in submission/praying to a silent god/to prove your suspicions/and put an end to your superstitions/fingers crossed/I pinky swear/that with each last breath/I’ll thank God for the air/and science for the protest/that it wasn’t Him who put it there/there is more to this reflex/backing away from the pretext/white flags/we shun fags/and throw ou the dirty rags/not healed from our leprosy/our lack of controlled celibacy/we lose every limb we had once intended to keep/its just a physicality/this thing between you and me/not it’s not deep/secrets we never intended to keep/like how you fucked that girl/instead of me/how I ran away from home/watched my life bleed/but it’s blood that wiped me clean/and dreams that keep me sane/no longer the same/yet I wince at your name/at your picture/the fixation/the realization/is to come in time/yet for now now/lost in the how/I could write on and on/ what worth are words/well they are my soul/but tonight they they are what it takes to make me a little bit more whole/a broken record plays through my head/sleep won’t come/neither will the waking dead/I spit on the ground/wait for the sound/disapproval/removal/from living in acceptance/my selfish negligence/ write words/shout a curse/my tongue swerves/my lips curve/I whisper/STOP/the clock drops/its meandering hand/on the small of my back/borders crossed/time lost/my eyes are not for turning back
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